Marcy and I have talked about having a play date for some time … and we finally made it happen. I was all excited and asked Doug to find something to do with himself for the day so Marcy and I could have free reign of the house. Marcy laughed and asked “are you sure we can handle all seven of our kids?” Marcy couldn’t see my face over the phone, but my eyes bulged out of my head … SEVEN kids? That’s only three less than 10! I double checked her math … sure enough, her three kids and my four made seven. What on earth did I sign us up for? Maybe Doug could stay home … then we’d have an adult on both levels of the house. Is it even legal in the state of WI to have a home daycare with two adults and seven kids?
Saturday came and the Schaefer family arrived ready and raring to go! All decked out in Owl outfits I might add! The Schaefer girls are themed! After a bathroom orientation (to ensure no accidents) the kids went into the basement to discover new toys and play, while the mamas sat upstairs with the babies – drinking coffee. There was the normal amount of questions, mommy calls from the bottom of the stairs and disagreements on what to play. Things were going well!
Now you need to know that Marcy is both a huge supporter of me AND she brings out the gosh honest truth in me. So when she asked me how things were going, I had a moment of bare naked truth. I told her it was rough. I expected being a stay at home mom would be hard, but thought it would also have its perks. What a crock! It’s hard … really hard! And … take this with a grain of salt, I don’t like it! I love my kids to the moon and back, but sometimes I just don’t want to be a mom. For just one day. Just to get a break. But being a mom is one job you can never really escape.
When going to the bathroom, Jaden is talking to me thru the door. In our family, we don’t always close the bathroom door, but since staying home, I close it just to have a few mins where I can’t be climbed on or touched. Getting thrown up on and peed on. Not being able to do what you want to do – the kids decide that! No matter where I am in the house, I think about if the triplets are really ok on their own. Of course they are! They are all in their car seats, not driving the car for the first time! And when I’m in the same room as them, listening to every grunt and groan making sure they are still breathing. Now I know I need a chill pill … in fact I wish I could take 15 chill pills and let the afternoon roll by. But being a mom never escapes you. Let’s be real, I wouldn’t be able to check out … the guilt is haunting. So what do I do with all this? Let it consume me? Take over my life and make me miserable?
Hell no! I’ve got to find a way to conquer. It will not control me! (ok I’m starting to feel like I’m leading a rally of moms in bathrobes, curlers in their hair and a cup of coffee in their right hand). My husband told me point-blank – “This is your life now. You need to find a way to adjust”. While at the time it was infuriating (since I was looking for a few “poor babies” and a pep talk on how great I was doing) – he’s right. (Don’t tell him I said that tho haha). Marcy hit it right on the head – survival mode. Yes, I laugh and I find something to enjoy each day – but I’m surviving. I need to do what needs to get done. I’m a real mom. I struggle and I have my bad days (Doug can confirm that if you don’t believe me!) Some times I don’t like being a mom, but I love my kids!
We survived our Saturday playdate and dare I say we enjoyed ourselves? We took a picture just to prove that we did in fact have seven kids and survived!
Here’s proof they even had fun!
Jaden kept asking Marcy if he could hold her baby. We got the two on the couch and Jaden kept “whoochie cooching” Mira. Holding her hand … intertwining their legs … Marcy had to remind him not to get fresh a few times! Oh Jaden, starting so young! She is SO darn cute, I can at least say he’s got great taste!
Chapstick is awesome! Not sure how we started talking about it, but Jaden and Veda tell how awesome Chapstick is. The Japanese even use it (says Jaden).
So three cheers to a great playdate, getting the coffee shakes because I forgot to eat breakfast with my five cups of coffee and to being a real mom!