Decisions

Decisions.  Everyone is faced with thousands of decisions every day.  We decide so much about our day, yet there is so much out of our control.

I get to decide how I react to others.  I get to decide what kind of role model I am.  I can’t stop someone from mistreating me or the words they choose to use against me.  But I can control how I respond to them.  I need to have faith that it will be enough.

I decided to be a wife back on September 19, 2009.  Today I choose to be a wife who listens and serves.  I’m going to focus on what I need to do rather than seek recognition.  I am going to BE the woman who deserves recognition rather than ask if I’m doing ok.

Who do I need approval from?  Myself.  I live with me more than anyone else.  (I would argue that lately Jaden spends just as much time with me as I do — considering I rarely get to use the bathroom alone!  haha)  I need to be at peace with my actions.

I choose to be a teacher – to my kids and others.  Even greater, I choose to be a teacher thru actions and role modeling.  Actions are heard even when someone doesn’t want to listen.

I am a role model to my boys.  They will one day look to me when they are weak or need guidance.  What will I tell them?  How will I decide to show them?

All of us mothers have hopes and dreams for our kids.  I hope my sons are happy, healthy, brave and truthful.  I hope they have strength to stand up for what they believe in and the passion to purse their own dreams.

What guidance will I offer my kids?  Here is my answer:  I will strive to be the person I want my kids to be.

I will seek happiness and be brave in the face of hardship.  I will be honest and truthful with my friends and family.  I will stand for what I believe in and I will follow my passion in life.

The Love and Logic book instructs that if kids see their parents making healthy choices, kids will learn how to make healthy choices.  If they see a parent who makes poor decisions, the child will learn to make poor choices.  If the parent has respect for herself, the child will learn how to have self-respect.

It’s so easy to justify my own actions, but what if I caught my son doing the same?  It was ok for me to have a few cigarettes when out with college friends, but what if I found a pack of cigarettes in my son’s backpack?  Someone puts me down and I yell back.  Blame them for letting ME down.  How would I want Jaden to respond if someone put him down?  What would make me a proud mother?

They will learn by watching my actions.  And I get to decide what action I will take.  I choose to be the person I want my kids to be.

Love, Mel

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