People keep saying “the color orange will never be the same” or “every time I see the color orange, I think of your son Owen.” I couldn’t agree more … but it’s different for me. I’ve been asking myself what does orange mean to me now? Owen (obviously). But what else? What do I want orange to mean? If there was a message I could give everyone through just a color, what would it be? What should it be? What is it supposed to be?
Owen’s life was sacrificed but two others were saved and even more lives have been touched. Is Orange a reminder of sacrifice? How to give unselfishly to others. By living for others you find truth in yourself. Just look at his story and how it’s flooded the web. I’ve got everyone’s attention (for whatever reason). Lord what am I supposed to be telling them?
Perhaps it’s that we live in a reality that is horrid – children die, innocent people suffer from illness. There is pain and sorrow. Orange is a reminder to do something to ease the pain of this world. Be the hands of God and make a change. Offer comfort to someone who is in pain. Be a refuge for God’s love. Be a warrior in Owen’s army to fight for the good. It doesn’t have to be a big change … perhaps it’s that you are going to hug your kids every night before bed. Think of the memory you’d be creating for your kids and how it would multiply out to their children. Four generations down the line might be hugging their kids a little tighter, all because you decided to make a difference. Maybe it’s a bigger change like starting a ministry at your church or making blankets for others. These are a few movements I’ve heard about from readers. But whatever you feel moved to do … is it for the greater good? What kind of impact are you creating on the world? How is it spider webbing out into something much larger?
When the triplets wear orange, even if it’s just orange in the screen print on their outfit, I can’t help but think “You’re not alone today. You’re wearing your brother. He’s here, right now, with you.” Is orange meant to be a reminder to those who feel alone? Owen, the angel baby, is with you. Where ever orange is, he is near.
Is orange meant to be a reminder to cherish our babies? They come into this world, but aren’t truly ours. Hug them and kiss them while we have them. If they leave before we do, have faith, have the courage to believe they are with our Father.
Is orange a constant reminder that the life cycle isn’t perfect? We are taught that you die when you get old. We will leave this world before our children. I have wondered if Doug or I would die first. What would I do if Doug went before I did? What would I hope he knows about me to make sure my final wishes are granted? But a child? Never crossed my mind. It’s not a part of the circle of life. (whoa just had a Lion Kind flash there).
What is the circle of life when I’m not the only one who has lost a child? So many stories have come forward and keep coming forward. I just heard about a 3 month old in the Appleton area who passed. Do I dare say the number is disgusting? What kind of God allows so many children to be called to heaven? What kind of God allows parents to experience such pain?
Someone told me that it was ok to take my pain to God. It’s ok to yell in my prayers and to cry and wail out to Him. He’s bigger than our pain and He can “handle it.” When I look at Jaden and when he gets so upset, I want him to come to me, to cry in my lap and be mad with me. I don’t care that the shoulder of my shirt gets wet with tears and covered in boogers. Being his mother, I can see passed his pain and see how this is going to be ok at some point. I’m not mad or dissapointed that he’s crying or angry. My heart hurts and I hug him tighter, trying in any way to comfort his pain. Granted he’s usually crying about an action figure or skinned knee, but is this sort of the same way God looks at our pain? He is a ‘parent’ to us, right? I welcome Jaden’s tears and hug him through them. I blow his nose and offer him a Popsicle after he has skinned his knee. Is finding comfort in a color my Popsicle? A special treat from my Father to help me feel better?
Maybe it’s all of these meaning. Or I might have totally missed the message all together. I just feel from deep within that there is meaning here. Orange has a special task here. Maybe I’ll never know why orange is so important. Maybe I’ll be given all the answers when I too leave this world. What I do know is that I’ve been wearing orange for 37 days straight … and I don’t plan on quitting any time soon! Keep rockin’ out the orange!!