Reflections from Church Today

I went to church today with a heavy heart.  I left right after having an argument with Doug and I still had yesterday on my mind.  The opening songs couldn’t have been more fitting.  I have to share them with you.

First was “One of These Days”.

Here are the lyrics:

One of these days I’m gonna see
The hand that took the nails for me.
One of these days I’m gonna hold
The key to the mansion built for me.
One of these days I’m gonna walk
The streets of gold that were paved for me.
One of these days I’m gonna see
My Savior face to face.

This song got me thinking about Owen up in heaven who already sees, walks and holds of these things.  Jaden told me on the ride to church that Owen is all grown up in heaven.  I asked him what he looked like … Does he have light or dark hair?  Jaden replied so confidently.  “It’s both It’s light and dark.”. I smiled. Made me think about how one day there won’t be different races.  We’ll all be a mix of each other.

The next song “I Am Free”,

…the refrain brought me to tears.

I am free
I am free to dance.
I am free to live for You.
I am free.

I am free to run and dance.  He is big enough for my sins and my pain.  I’m allowed to be happy.  I not forgetting Owen.  I give me pain and weight of life to Him. God is carrying it for me.  I am free of my pain and my sins.  I am free to dance.

It’s ok to be happy or to smile. It’s ok to travel on from this place … To run.  I am free to do so .  I don’t have to be chained to this world.  To this nightmare.

An answer to my fear from last night.


  1. I have been following your blog for awhile now, and I must say, I thought of baby Owen last night. We were at the Brewer game, and a Monarch was flying throughout the stadium! I tried to capture a picture but unfortunately it didn’t turn out. It’s amazing how such a little sweet baby’s story can resonate all over the state (and country)! Your family is always in my prayers.

  2. Beautiful songs with beautiful messages. Thanks for sharing those.

    I love sweet little Jaden’s faith. I have fallen in love with your little sweet boys and I don’t even know them. 🙂

    I’m glad you got what you needed out of church yesterday. Feels good.

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