I have been getting more and more worried about today since I schedule the doctor’s appointment two weeks ago. My dentist found a raised freckle on the inside of my upper lip. He referred me to an oral surgeon to take a look at it. I have had freckles in my mouth before and had them biopsied. This wasn’t the first time I was having something like this done … but dang was I nervous.
I don’t think it was because I really thought the freckle was cancerous … I just didn’t want to have it cut out of my lip and to have stitches. It’s funny how I can be through so much worse, yet it’s the small things that get me all worked up. I can be totally fine about having a c-section, yet I need someone to hold my hand when they put in the IV. I can be thrown from a car, and call 911 myself, yet my palms sweat at the thought of having a freckle removed from my lip.
Funny how fear works – it’s totally irrational. It has no rhyme or reason. Yet it’s so real. It’s controlling and can be powerful. That is if you let it …
You have the capability to control your fears – you have the power to conquer them. But you must choose to do so. No one can fix that for you. It doesn’t matter how much I reassure Jaden that there aren’t any monsters in the dark – he needs to have his night-light on. He has to decide and believe that it’s not scary. I can’t do that for him. I can provide reassurance and encouragement, but in the end, he needs to control his own fears.
So as I laid in the chair today and the doctor asked me if I was ready – I had to take charge. “Yes, I’m ready.” It didn’t hurt, my entire lip was totally numb. But I had to take some deep breaths. At times I had to close my eyes. It started to freak me out when he was putting in the stitches … so I held my hands together under the paper apron they put on me and I focused on breathing. I reminded myself that it was just my mind that was scared. Nothing hurt, nothing was wrong, it was just fear … that’s all.
And I did it! I was just fine — AND I have 5 stitches to brag about! Overcoming the fear I felt when walking into the waiting room had to be a choice. The smiling face on the receptionist wasn’t going to take it away, the numbing gel they rubbed into my lip wouldn’t numb the fear. I had to work at overcoming it.
What are you afraid of? What makes your heart race out of nerves just thinking about it? Can you change your thought process? Take control of your fear – face it and conquer it. I promise you the stitches are worth the bragging!
Great post today!
I am scared of so many things. Bugs being a huge one… only certain bugs, for example centipedes. Spiders used to get me going too, but not so much anymore unless they are big gross looking ones.
I’ve been unable to fall asleep at night lately because a home a few houses down from ours on our street was broken into about a week ago. Some guy crawled in through their front window at night while they were sleeping. Luckily they have two big dogs that bark at everybody so they knew something was up right away, but the guy ran out their front door and wasn’t caught. It freaks me out to know that it could have been OUR house. We have a bungalow, and he could have crawled right into our girls’ bedroom in the middle of the night. The idea of a thief coming into our house when we are sleeping is awful enough, and makes me feel really unsafe… but to know my girls could have been subject to that? That makes me terrified. Knowing I might not have been able to protect them… it freaks me right now.
Anyways, you better believe that no matter what, we are going to bed at night with every window closed and locked.
Although I’ve always HATED spiders, I never really feared anything until I had kids…now, it’s a different story-especially knowing your story. My biggest fear would be something happening to my kids…I don’t know how much strength I would have to go through something like that and I commend you for what you’ve went through and the strength you’ve shown through it all. I think even risks I’ve taken…stuff like bungee jumping and sky coaster type of stuff that I’ve always enjoyed doing make me more leary now, only because I think “what if something happens to me-what will happen to my boys-what will they do without me?” I certainly don’t let these fears run my life, but they pop into the old noggin when I least expect it!
I had to have a mole removed yesterday that they are checking for cancer and I’m scared. They said it’s not likely but I’m still nervous..